yesterday, i couldn't bring myself to writing anything because i was so confused as to what the freak was goin with my mind. for hours i was so sure, and then i was so unsure for forever. then there was some stupid bull ish! omg! for starters, i will forever stick by my statement that if you're under the height of like 5'4" i will so not get along with you, just because its been that way for a while. but anyway.
dramu: i am so freakin sick of the words, "i've got to talk to you" because it always ends up bad! i mean the past two days i've heard things i don't wanna hear. i've yelled at people, and i've questioned my own sanity! but anyway, those words were said to me yesterday, almost as if it was intentional. and she was like, and i hurt you and i'm sorry. a true friend yeah would've told me, but would've told me in the privacy not infront of 20people making feel like a complete idiot. and then, i had to think about it with our schools police officer. and she so got me to thinking...why tell me out loud like that? and i was like omg! there's so something fishy going around here...and i secretly don't wanna know anymore. because i want this damn dramu to go away. it's stressing me out :(
him: he makes me happy, enough said. though i do have to admit he's an adorable person and makes me smile, but you know i swear he's a tad clueless about what he does. but i'll let it slide. but what this is about is the things he says & does that make feel less cold/flu-like. he was my pillow for lunch yesterday, which is totally the opposite of what i would do. okay yes i sound freakishly girly but i mean i honestly i can't help myself. its such an amazing feeling that flows from tips of my fingers and surges unexplainable electricity through-out my body. and alot of the time it seems so unexplainable because a lot of people know the feeling but those that don't make it so hard that all i can do is smile and be like "i don't know how to tell you" and even occaisionally show some people why i'm so happy, but if i was to show it now it may just make some of be like, "you're soo lying" i'm telling the gosh honest truth. or maybe this is some heroin based dream i've thought up whilst i'm in a coma? i have no idea! whether its real or fake, i'm enjoying the moment
finals: ok so yep, the word finals is probably making you cuss out of control but it's making me do the same. i think i've passed every one that i have taken far, which makes me proud. if i'm lucky i'll pass the next 3. two are easy and one requires me to have a thought process, which i hope i have. i'm trying to study...but my brain keeps shutting off.
all in all the last two days have been full of lies and smiles. and i for one am sick of the lies!
bring on the smiles
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